Last updated: June 3, 2026
Welcome to UNEMPLOYABLE™ (theunemployable.xyz and shop.theunemployable.xyz, the “Site”). UNEMPLOYABLE™ is a project of Ricotta Bear LLC, a consulting business (“we,” “us”) — any purchases or charges relating to the Site are made through Ricotta Bear LLC. By using the Site you agree to these Terms. If you don't agree, that's okay — you can leave, which is more than most employers let you do.
The Site is a work of comedy and social commentary. It is not Gmail and is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or sponsored by Google, or by any company, brand, or logo referenced on the Site. All emails, senders, and “rejections” are fictional and auto-generated. Company names are used nominatively to parody the universally identical job-rejection experience. Any resemblance to a real message you received is coincidental — because they all say the same thing.
The Site is provided for personal, non-commercial entertainment. Don't use it to harass, defame, or impersonate anyone, don't scrape or hammer it, and don't try to break it. The personalization feature lets you put a name on the rejections; only use names you have the right to use, and keep it good-natured.
The UNEMPLOYABLE™ name, brand, designs, copy, and artwork are owned by their creator and may not be copied, resold, or used commercially without permission. The code is the author's; the jokes are everyone's pain.
Merchandise is “coming soon.” When the shop launches, purchases, shipping, returns, and refunds will be governed by the terms shown at checkout and by the third-party commerce provider that fulfills orders. Joining the waitlist is not an order and obligates no one.
The Site is provided “as is,” without warranties of any kind. We don't guarantee it will get you a job, a date, or inner peace. To the fullest extent permitted by law, we are not liable for any damages arising from your use of the Site.
The Site links to third-party sites (the shop, social media, and — occasionally, as a joke — a certain music video). We're not responsible for third-party content.
We may update these Terms at any time. Continued use after changes means you accept them.
Questions? contact@theunemployable.xyz.
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